LAWL

Okayyy

Really! The Stress Wiener is SFW!

Yes indeed it is.

Oh Noes! Not AGAIN!!!

From the "My. Brain. HURTS." file:
Sodom and Gamorah, the Movie!

What next? Ragnarok: the Musical?

----------------
Listening to: Led Zeppelin - Immigrant Song
via FoxyTunes

Got this from a colleague . . .New MMORPG

I've been outside. It's overrrated.

Traditionally Outside receives extremely high ratings by those who like to see others play it, and these people are in many cases comfortably ensconced Inside themselves. Outside was released many years ago, it was in fact the first massively multiplayer game, and yet it has always managed to avoid the double-edged Retro tag. In its favor, continual user updates have kept Outside current; there are always new things to see and do Outside. Participants are permitted, to some extent, to modify their own areas of Outside, which is a large part of the fun of the game. However it seems that in the end one is modifying Outside largely for the sake of it, and having done it, there is a distinct feeling of "now what?"

In terms of the traditional target age content metrics, Outside is remarkably high in sex, violence and challenges to traditional values, despite the strong child-focussed marketing it receives. Many would go so far as to say that for a child to develop the ability to cope with Outside is essential, as long as the harm incurred is not too debilitating. Children injured playing Outside are usually comforted by parents, and soon encouraged to go Outside again; this leads to the conclusion that somehow Outside has escaped any and all of the usual moralizing that surrounds the videogaming industry. One might say that Outside gets a free pass from the Jack Thompsons of this world.

That aside, how does Outside actually rate? The physics system is note-perfect (often at the expense of playability), the graphics are beyond comparison, the rendering of objects is absolutely beautiful at any distance, and the player's ability to interact with objects is really limited only by other players' tolerance. The real fundamental problem with the game is that there is nothing to do.

In terms of game play the game sets few, if any, goals: the major one is merely "survive". What goals a player sets, are often astonishingly tedious to actually achieve, and power-ups and gear upgrades, let alone extra weapons, are few and far between. Some players choose accumulation of money, one of the many point systems in the game, as a goal, but distribution of this is often randomized and it can be hard to tell what activities will lead to gaining points in advance, and what the risks will be.

Other players choose to focus on accumulation of personal abilities, the variety of which greatly exceeds the capacity of any individual to accumulate; again, the game requires players to engage in years of grinding to achieve any notable standard with a skill or ability. Players are issued abilities and characteristics largely at random, and it is entirely possible for a player to be nerfed beyond any reasonable expectation of being able to play the game, or to be buffed to the point where anything he or she does is markedly easier. Unfortunately over time, player abilities tend to degrade, unless significant effort is made to keep skills up. This reviewer cannot emphasise this enough: Outside requires a huge time investment to build up player abilities, exceeding any other massively multiplayer game on the market by some three orders of magnitude.

Players are encouraged to focus on social interaction, which can be engaged in in a variety of ways. In fact it's extraordinarily difficult to solo anything whatsoever in Outside, apart from basic skill and knowledge accumulation quests. One of the major forms of social interaction in the game is based largely around the addition of new players to Outside, and is both complex and, in comparison to the storyline-driven romance quests of, say, Baldur's Gate or Mass Effect, they are immensely difficult. Dedicated players of Outside, however, report that the romance quests are among the most rewarding the game has to offer.

The game world is immense, perhaps unfeasibly so. The sheer amount of resources that went into development of the Outside environment is staggering to consider. Outside is a world of tremendous size, containing examples of every known real-world terrain type and inhabited by every known real-world animal. On the other hand it is somewhat lacking in the traditionally expected, more interesting, zones where the developers would be given the opportunity to show off their skills in varying the physics and graphics of the game. There are, for instance, no zones where gravity varies to any significant degree.

The respawn rate of objects and players is ridiculously slow. A dead player can expect to wait for years to respawn, and will be set back to zero assets and a tiny, nearly helpless form. Death is hardcore, and resurrection all but impossible. Outside is not a game for the QQers out there!

In terms of the social environment, almost anything goes. Outside has a vast network of guilds, many of its players are active participants in designing the game's social environment, and almost any player will be able to find company to undertake their desired group quests. On the other hand, gold-buying is rife, the outskirts of virtually every city zone in the game are completely overrun by farmers, and the developers have so far proven themselves reluctant to answer petitions, intervene in inter-player disputes, or nerf broken skills and abilities. Indeed this reviewer will go so far as to say that the developers are absent from the game entirely, and have left it to its own devices. Fortunately, server uptime has been 100% from day 1, despite there being only one server for literally billions of players.

On the whole, Outside is overrated, and many gamers will find themselves forced by friends and family to play it against their will, but it still deserves a high rating. I give it 7/10, and look forward to improvements in future patches.

Happy Valentine's Day, Texas . . .

Sex Toy Ban overturnd by court. Legislature to reconvene, President to return to Crawford.

Praise Teh Sacred Google!

This. Is. C00l.

The Discordian in me loves this kind of stuff. Eris and Google -- BFF!

Google's High Holy Day is September 14, the anniversary of the date the domain google.com was registered. And, it's just five days before another geek holiday, Talk Like A Pirate Day. A holiday devoted to the discovery of truth and good, not to mention pirates, is a perfect antidote to the annual beating around the head and shoulders with the proverbial bloody shirt every Sept 11.

Of course the Dungeon Master in me beat them to it awhile ago.


----------------
Listening to: Seanan McGuire - Still Catch The Tide
via FoxyTunes

I Can Has Teh Phunni

Introducing LOLRats

Be afraid.

Random bits, bytes, nybbles, etc

1. " . . . that [his] name not be lost to the knowledge of men . . . " -- One of the very best folksingers who ever lived has not had his tunage for sale on the iTunes Store . . . until now. When I started buying music via iTunes, I looked in vain for Canadian folk muisc legend Stan Rogers. I was first introduced to Stan's music in, of all places, the SCA (yes, his songs are almost as "period" as an iPod). I first heard Barrett's Privateers at a Society bardic circle. I asked for the lyrics from the bard and learned the song by heart by the time I got home from the event (a 5 hour drive to An Tir for a war). I ran into more Stan Rogers goodness a few years later in the context of what was then the most compelling science fiction RPG background of the 1990s: Traveller: The New Era. Apparently, one of the developers was a Canadian, because one of the adventures for that game involved a starship called the Mary Ellen Carter. In many ways, that song pretty much sums up TNE. One trip through teh google later, I made the connection between these two experinces and Stan Rogers. Once other, more pressing, needs are met, I'll be downloading teh good stuff again. I currently have recordings of both songs -- the rather good 3 Pints Gone cover of Mary Ellen Carter and, in two of the greatest offenses ever recorded against the memory of a great artist, that fools-gold voiced tenor frank emerson's "covers" of MEC and Barrett's Privateers. If you're going to pay tribute to a legend AT LEAST GET THE LYRICS RIGHT AND DON'T DROP VERSES! Biggest waste of two bucks ever. And don't get me started on the waste of iTunes Library space that is his version of The Minstrel Boy! To paraphrase PeeJee from Something Positive, were I female, I could menstrate better music! I can only hope his name is lost to the knowledge of men!

2. ID10T: It's not just for computer novices anymore!
Customer calls in, issue is that his Mac is booting to a blank gray screen on its LCD display. This is not an especially common issue. There are notes from prior contacts where the previous "tech" documented that he did "everything" -- reset SMC, booted to CD, advised trying an external monitor and calling back with the result. He did everything, all right . . . everything but what was to me the blindingly obvious: resetting the fscking PRAM. I had Mister Customer reset the system's PRAM, and lo and behold, built-in video returned.

/rant=ON
Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls: I simply could not believe this. Resetting PRAM fixes a lot of stuff: USB / Firewire / ethernet / modem port issues, mis-recognition of the hard drive and most especially video issues. Usually PRAM resets are an overused troubleshooting step for issues where they are singularly ineffective, typically startup issues that arise after the OS starts loading. This is stuff any noob fresh out of training knows.

And this guy was NOT a newbie. Nor was he from an outsourced contact center. He sat two isles over from me. He made a customer troubleshoot ineffectually and even left him with the expectation that his system would need service, for an issue that should have been resolved with the very first troubleshooting step tried. He made someone call in a second time, wait on hold to music that may not quite be to taste, for an issue that should have been fixed in less than 5 minutes.

People like him are why I sometimes get angry enough to explode. Why? Because call center tech support reps like me are ranked for perks like desirable schedules, promotions, awards and such by two things: sales and call statistics . . . especially call duration. I got the distinct feeling from the customer that he felt rushed by the rep (something we are NOT supposed to do) because after we did the quick fix on the one system he had two other issues with other computers for me to look at! Fscking stats whores like him do this all the time. So you piss off a customer and leave me to clean up the mess. Not to mention hosing my call stats, which makes getting awards, promotions, and a decent schedule harder.
/rant=OFF
I feel a bit better now....

Abe Lincoln Meets Bill Gates . . .

The Gettysburg Address delivered via Microsoft PowerPoint(tm)

As Scottish as . . .

. . . deep-fried Mars Bars?

I wonder what the WW point value of this might be...or that of haggis?

This explains much . . .

From The Onion

Reasons Fox News Sucks, Number 2864

The Onion does it a LOT better, guys . . . .

Inagural webcomic post...

Here's some webcomic goodness from Iz over at Izsanity