My Rite of Autumn

One of the great spiritual truths I've gleaned from my Pagan path is that the Wheel of the Year offers a good model for timing some of life's bigger tasks that are not directly tied to religious liturgy or agrarian life. One of the things I have been doing annually between the Autumn Equinox and Samhain is taking stock of my life, cataloguing the wins and losses over the course of the year, celebrating goals achieved and identifying new opportunities for spiritual growth.

OK, New Years' Resolutions are somewhat universal, and in a way, this is exactly that.

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I differentiate it from the mundane practice through timing and the timing's significance on the Wheel. This is the season of the harvest. The seeds I planted -- and nurtured, or neglected -- have come to fruition or ruination in a spiritual harvest. I reaped the benefits of positive change and identified things I need to work on. In addition, the Wheel offers some conveniently spaced mileposts for evaluating my progress -- something that is neglected in conventional New Years' resolutions. This year I will be evaluating my progress at the Cross-Quarters.

By Walpurgis Night, I have everything is in writing and ready to go for the new year. I usually do not share this on my blog. There are elements of this year's version that I am not prepared to share here, but here is what I can share.

1. Physical health. I am closer to being wound free than I was last year. I am eating better and generally healthier, lower in weight. I need to build up my physical endurance through more exercise. I want to be able to walk at least a mile without issues by this time next year. Right now, walking to the bus stop is difficult. I want to be wound free so I can swim next year.

2. Emotional health. I am now aware of the mechanics and pathology of chronic anger and depression. My intense work on this has paid dividends. I am not quite where I want to be here just yet. This is one of the important progress areas. My social anxiety and panic attacks are responding to medication and good old-fashioned visualization.  An opportunity here is for me to eschew beating on myself verbally when I make a mistake.

3. Socialization. I achieved the goal of getting into a regular  tabletop gaming group and thereby meeting people in Fresno who are not connected to Jameece. Another goal achieved was to set aside some nightly quiet time for just Jameece and I to watch TV together. I have begun the process of reconciling with my birth family. I have not been in close contact with my siblings, child, grandchild, godchild  and parents.  I made limited progress in changing this, and I need to make more progress. This year, keeping in touch moves to the front of the queue.

4. Reading: Dresden Files, October Daye, and Mira Grant. My progress here has been abysmal.

My other goals concern my relationship with Jameece, and I am not going to publish them here.